I think I figured it out. I put him in to the meeting in Zoom app, and then it keeps that setting when I use Outlook to create new meetings and puts him as alternate on those "in the background" b/c he was there in zoom. This seems to be an oversight to me (aka bug) but I removed him from a meeting using zoom app and opened others and didn't see him so that was at least a workaround.
My Zoom tech support got escalated and I was finally provided a resolution that worked!!
If you are using the Zoom Scheduler plugin for Chrome (google calendar):
In a Chrome browser window, on the top right, there should be a blue zoom icon (if not, click the extension puzzle button to view the plugins and you can select "pin" so that the zoom icon appears).
Select the zoom icon and in the top right-hand corner, there should be a settings gear. Scroll down and the is a field for the alternative host. Clear this field of the person you have been trying to remove and click save!!